Monday, 15 June 2009

The Real Gardener's World

Dig, hoe, sow, grow. Dig, hoe, sow, don't grow. There are certain facts of life for the real gardener that Monty Don and his crew of merry, smug, "look at me I'm so clever" fellow gardeners never tell you about. Like how the birds peck the hell out of your first strawberries. Or how your cat leaves a crafty poo in your roots bed which you then pick up thinking its a stone. (I'm sure I saw Charlie sniggering behind his paw.) And how come Alan Titchmarsh never accidentally uses acid compost when planting out his herbs. Then there's the slaughter of the innocents..... I just can't bring myself to toss the excess seedlings onto the compost heap. Thousands of tiny screams, every one a dagger in my heart, as I rip the little rootlings from the soil. How in God's name am I going to come to terms with slaughtering Pinky and Perky!
Meanwhile, there's a heartbreaking moment for Dave. Trinny suffers her first injury. A flat tyre. Or as Dave puts it, a broken foot. She's propped up, incapacitated and useless. Not good attributes in a working tractor. I swear there was a small tear in Dave's eye when he saw the damage - Trinny just isn't the same with only 3 wheels.

Veg of the Day:
Beetroot - what funny little seeds they are; like tiny alien brains. Runner up for Veg of the Day is the courgette for putting out it's first flower - very tempting to whip it off and deep fry it but that would be a tad cruel when it took so long for the plant to squeeze it out.

Tool of the Day:
Bottle opener - vital for teasing the cork from the bottle at the end of the day as you ease your aching body onto the bench, fill the glass to the brim and drink a toast to the hard day's work in the veg patch.

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